b e t t e r FAMILY
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•
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Your child may be years away from leaving
home, but the time to start teaching
grown-up life skills is now.
Otherwise, you could find yourself in Duston Spear’s
shoes. Spear,
58
, is a painter and art teacher from Pound
Ridge, New York, and she remembers the panicked phone
call from her daughter, then a student at New York
University in Manhattan. “Mom?,” she cried, “the ATM
machine isn’t working! It won’t give me any money.” It took
a few minutes, but the concerned mom figured out the
problem: “Honey, you have to put money into the bank
before you can take it out of the ATM.” Teaching these life
lessons now will lead to functioning adults later.
Lcare
When to teach: ages
16-17
Key
teaching tool: A pre-college visit
to the
doctor explaining routine concerns
Life lesson plan:
► Arrange for him to talk with your
family doctor in private.
► Teach him how to get a prescrip-
tion filled.
► Explain howto use health insurance.
► Make sure your child knows how
to use the college’s health facility
to find a doctor.
Most kids are positively
ess aboutthebasics
care of their
l e d l l i i .
James Fitzgibbon, M.D.,
dire ctor o f adolescent medicine at
Akron Children’s Hospital in Ohio.
H ow to keep house
When to teach: ages 5-7
Key teaching tool: Basic chores
Life lesson plan:
► Estab lish tw o sp ecific, d aily ch o re s . F o r
exam p le, a t 5, kids can p u t to y s a w a y o r
help s e t th e tab le.
When to teach: ages 8-10
Key teaching tool: Chores with
consequences
Life lesson plan:
I L e t th e m w a tc h an d help y o u . T h e n let
th e m c o m p le te task s o n th e ir o w n . Pra ise
a jo b w ell d o n e. If a c h o re is d o n e
in c o rre c tly , su g g est a tric k th a t w ill help
c o rre c t th e p ro b le m fo r next tim e.
► S e t up a “ s ta r c h a rt” re w a rd system ,
a w a rd in g a s ta r fo r a w e e k ’s w o rth o f
su cc e s s fu lly c o m p le te d ch o re s. S ta rs are
re d e e m e d fo r m o n ey, p rivileges, o r o th e r
re w a rd s. A p p ly p re v io u s ly ag reed - u p o n
c o n s e q u e n c e s if c h o re s a re n ’t d on e.
o w to av
ehavior
When to teach: ages 10-17
Key Teaching tool: Role playing
Life lesson plan:
H e lp y o u r ch ild b ra in s to rm o p tio n s
fo r g e ttin g h e rs e lf o u t o f s c a ry
situ a tio n s safely. D o n ’t s to p until
y o u ’re satisfied sh e k n o w s w h a t to
do, an d w o rk in b rush-up sessio n s
on o c c a s io n an d b e fo re e ven ts. H a v e
h e r a c t o u t th e s e scen a rio s:
I Y o u ’re b ein g b ullied a t sch o o l. W h a t d o
y o u d o ?
► Y o u ’re a t a p a rty an d o n e o f y o u r frie n d s is
g e ttin g d run k. W h a t d o y o u d o if s o m e o n e
s ta rts ta k in g a d v a n ta g e o f h er?
► Y o u ’re in th e b a ck s e a t o f a car. T h e d riv e r
a c ts im p a ired an d th e c a r is w e a v in g a ro u n d .
2 1 2
FEBRUARY 2010 BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS
by CHRISTIAN M ILLM AN
PHOTOS: (TOOTHBRUSH) VEER; (BOY) VEER MARKETPLACE
